5 year old daughter to me …
As I’m changing the baby’s diaper. “Yeah, hold on. I’m coming.”
“Coming…coming. I’m almost done.”
As I’m coming out of the bedroom and the baby’s in my arms and now two other children by my side, also trying to talk to me at the same time.
“Honey, wait … please. I just need to turn off the oven.”
As my husband has now walked in the kitchen and is talking to me.
“Hold on, Kelsey, don’t interrupt.”
In a softer, defeated voice,
“Ok, Mom …”
Probably 20 minutes later, if not more, I find her and ask, “Mommy’s exhausted. I’m so sorry. What did you need? You’ve been asking for me?”
She wrapped her little arms around my soft waist and smiled.
“I just wanted to tell you that I love you, and I think you’re a good Mommy. That was all.”
I could have collapsed in her arms right then and there.
I feel like I’m on autopilot and am barely coasting and all she wanted was to tell me something like that …
You know the “hurting mom heart” where it’s filled with so much love and pain and guilt, all at the very same time?
Some days I just feel like I’m not enough.
This, too … this, too, shall pass.
Some days our best to give feels like so little, but if our children feel (and know) they’re loved and that we’re trying …
That’s all that matters.